Which came first, right Time or right Age?

Did you know that Adam had his first fruits of love with Eve when they were passing through the jungles and Eve suddenly whispered in his ears and said, “Adam, now is the right time to do it”. Did you even know that Romeo married Juliet at the age of 35 when he owned a plush office at a New York street, a pent house at his London home and a palace bought in India.

If you know all this, then you should also know that I am just kidding.

Nothing of that sort happened and well, if it did, then I am unaware of. What I actually know is this: the right time and the right age myth is a nonsense. Marriage should be when your heart says. Romeo married Juliet because his heart said so, or so I feel and Adam had it with Eve because well their hearts, libidos everything pounced when they saw each other.

It should not be when you grow 25 and all your friends, relatives or your girl-friend(s) get married so you need to marry. Also, it shouldn’t be when you consider it as the eternal right time – the time when you feel you are secured and in the need of marrying someone or when you are simply bored and need a companion etc.

Although most of the time we get married either due to some right/wrong time constraints or our age reflecting in the mirror.

I have heard all the arguments when our neighbours explain our girls, that as soon as you graduate, you should get married first. Our relatives, never left behind, also discuss with us about other relatives and their swish weddings. They in fact, also bring in the photographs of ‘their’ choicest groom, eligible for the unmarried girl in the family.And they say this with enormous conviction, “if the girl does not marry by 23 (ya 23, you read it right!) she will not find a better groom, she will remain unmarried her entire life and the choicest groom is best suited for her kind of girl”. That perhaps is an enforced decision by the relatives on the girl and the girl finally hovers under the pressure.

Take a guy’s example, a little less pressurized specie than a girl. A girl complains that most of the guys are commitment phobic, and the guy in general wants to be like Adam and is always on a lookout for several Eves but when it comes to marriage he hides in the cave of excuses. He believes that he needs to settle first and every guy will have his own definition of settling. Or he gives all kinds of excuses: that he needs to first live his bachelor life; a life without any responsibility or a life where his freedom will not be encroached upon or just plain brainless reasons to evade marriage.

But to not marry in the right time or age also do have its own disadvantages. There are scientific arguments to this. When you get married at the age of 35, there are biological problems and it becomes difficult to conceive a child. Also, psychological problems arise when the mature 35 years old parents believe in not wasting any time in conceiving any child and instead have a well-heeled life. The problem also surfaces when the kid grows and the parent’s age too fast creating a big generation gap.

Therefore, what would you do to get married? Would you wait for the right time to convince yourself about marriage or would you go by the pressure of the surroundings and marry at any age around 23 to 28. My choice, I would rather marry when my heart would beat for a girl.